Krissie creates experiences that spark people on their journey of self-discovery. Right now, they do that in person through RAGEher and virtually through the Aliveness Collective.

What inspired you to set up RAGEher?

Krissie: In grad school (for my master's in transformational leadership and coaching), my professor said to me: "you haven't integrated your anger." I had no idea what he was talking about. But then in several of our trainings, I kept getting the same feedback--that I would shut down or be passive aggressive or indirectly communicate what I was feeling instead of actually expressing my anger directly or using it to create deeper, more vulnerable connection. I realized I was really stuffing my anger down. So, I started working with a coach who specialized in bodywork--bioenergetics specifically--and in those body sessions, anger started flowing out. It was like I was getting my life force energy back. Through connecting to my anger I started being more intentional in my life, going for my satisfaction more, speaking up in groups, and ruminating less.

And then I started reading all the stats on how unexpressed anger is harming women. We suffer from autoimmune disease, chronic fatigue, anxiety and depression at many times the rates of men... and it's being tied to inflammation, caused by suppressed anger. Which is so wild. We are so well trained to shove it in and down, but it is literally making us sick.

So, I wanted to create a space for women to feel it. To let the anger flow through and out of our bodies, because of my own experience with the benefits, and also because--let's be honest--we need more women using our anger as fuel to be direct, set boundaries, get our needs met, go for our satisfaction and live our purpose (and stop this BS of doing everything for others without taking care of ourselves).

Why is it so important for women to have spaces to express their rage together?

Krissie: Because when we come together, we give each other permission. When you hear a woman scream or sob or say NO! at the top of her lungs, it's easier to do it too. When a whole room of 20, 30 or 50 women are doing it, it normalizes it.

And we need to normalize women's anger. Yes, when we're together, but more so out in the world. But that takes practice. Many women who come to our events--even therapists with years of experience working with peoples' feelings--have not accessed their anger. Actually felt it course through their bodies. Because we are so accustomed to shutting it down.

It's only by starting to feel it that we can become more conscious to it when we're out in the world. And then when we're more conscious of it, we can start to USE it intentionally and assertively.

I have so many more things to say about why it's so important (like... we feel less alone, more connected, a part of something, belonging, like all our feelings are welcome and matter, that expression is a gift), but I'll leave you with this final thought:

There is something so beautiful about being witnessed and witnessing others. We all have such a deep need to be seen and heard--not in our perfection and with all the masks we wear--but in our rawest, most human form. When snot is dripping down our chin. When we're sweaty and blotchy. When we allow ourselves to put down the weight of the world for a tiny moment and be held... by a stranger. That's why we need these spaces.

What do you see as your most important job as a space holder/facilitator of women’s spaces?

Krissie: To be with myself while I'm being with others. If I'm ignoring or avoiding my own feelings, I can't be truly present with someone in theirs. So, I see my job as tending to myself while I'm also tending to the participants. And to meet people where they're at while also inviting them to step into discomfort. Ooh, and finally, to remember that human interactions aren't always perfect and that messiness is part of the game - so embrace it when it happens, because it will happen.

What has being in community with women expressing their rage given you as a space holder and as a participant?

Krissie: A deep reverence for our bodies and minds and everything the women I've supported and co-created space with are holding--so much pain and grief and hurt and rage--and the level of connection that comes with expressing that together. It's so freaking incredible to get to bear witness. One woman shared after an event something I'll never forget that really sums it up for me: "Sometimes it feels like a burden to live in the world as a woman, but when I looked up after raging at our circle, I could not have been more joyful and proud to be a woman and get in touch with these deep feelings."

An interview with Krissie McMenamin, founder of RAGEher

Event Information:

An interview with Krissie McMenamin, founder of RAGEher

Event Information:

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